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How to Motivate Yourself When You Feel Like a Failure

Failure is a not an easily-digestible word. It’s got a lot of sentiments that need some mulling over, and eventually you’ll need to gather up the nerves to finally spit it out of your system and say that you’re done with it.
Most people have experienced failure at one point in time, whether it be in love, career, or future goals. With the number of road blocks that you’ve come across with, the idea of “pushing forward” starts to sound pretty much challenging, if not totally ludicrous.
People are all too familiar with the old saying “If at first you don’t succeed, try again”. Over the years, it may have already lost its motivational appeal and understandably so. And if you’ve already reached the point of “defeat” and you’re all too ready to give up, then chances are you’ve already “tried again”. And yet, the most ambitious of people still search for that “ultimate” motivation—the trick that can help pull any one up the quickest when they get knocked down.
But do you really know what motivation is? It is defined by a something like an influence or a force that jolts someone to do something. In all its essence, people are on a perpetual hunt for this kind of external stimulus—they thrive when motivation is present, and falter when it’s not around.
So really, what is the trick? Have you tried thinking that maybe, just maybe, motivation is not what you need when your luck is down? Oftentimes, people let their situations and emotions define the way they’ll respond to it. People are too fixated in finding that external factor or guide in the midst of failure that they often forget to return to the internal guide—the “why”; the reasons for their existence. So the next time you are looking for motivation, consider these things instead:

1. Motivation is fleeting.

When you want something, that’s the time you get motivated. For example, you ate too much and gained extra pounds during the holidays, you want to lose it, and you’ll feel “motivated” to get back to the gym. Once the excitement wears off and you still have not seen your desired results, then you’ll go back to slacking. You see, a motivated person creates New Year’s resolutions, but a person with a purpose forms lasting habits.

2. Motivation can drive movement.

Motivation is our drive to move, often because people are often uncomfortable with being still. Motivation enables people to jump off couches, take a leap of faith and face the unknown. However motivation is not always the appropriate response to failure, because it may cause us to move when in fact what we need the most is to decompress and stay still and absorb everything that’s happened for a while.

3. Motivation is situational

People’s lives are composed of a diverse array of situations that necessitate a number of different responses. Motivation is situational and can help drive people towards a specific goal. However, what you should be looking for is purpose—something universal and not situational. Purpose is the foundation that people can return to in during tough times. When you spend time looking for motivation to help you get out of the dumps, you are just training your mind to fixate on something that you feel you need to solve. If you instead rest on your purpose, you’ll realize that one failure can never define your entire existence. In essence, motivation is localized, but finding purpose is a lifestyle.
So don’t let defeat overwhelm you, and never give motivation the steering wheel of your life. Failure is inevitable but purpose is a constant in your existence. In the midst of your failures, are looking for your next set of motivation or are you resting on the fact that you are more than just a collection of your defeats?

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